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Update!!
Eric at 2/8/2005 01:15:49 AM
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First, because absolutely no one demanded it,
Ineffectual Whore now has comments! My New Year's Net Resolution is to write more over there so comment away on our televisual ramblings.
Second, and more frightening, Eminem has sampled Martika in his new song "Toy Soldiers" (betcha can't guess which song out of her stunning oeuvre he chose) and it's awful. Her's totally slows down the rhythm of his and his sucks out loud.
Oh, before i forget: I passed two of the three Spanish tests I needed to take. Now I have one class left in college. Or do I? Updates as they happen. And I now (pointlessly)have a
MySpace profile. Why? My cousin Kim made me do it. Damn but there are tons of whores on that thing (not my cousin Kim, or Nicole mind you. Just, other whores) and I haven't yet found the actual purpose. It's like Friendster with HTML skills and less actual relevance.
Eric at 1/17/2005 01:59:47 AM
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There's a cancer in music that's rearing it's ugly head again. This sugary-sweet aural confection is a plague on our society and it must be stopped, especially now that it's forthcoming demonic vocal orgy is almost upon us. No, I don't refer to Ashlee Simpson or a similar pop-tart whose Radio Disney friendly hits have long infected the pop culture landscape. No friends, I speak of the music from the darkest recesses of all of pop--
Kidz Bop .
Ok, so that may have been a bit dramatic, but it still holds true. Kidz Bop is a depressingly bad and irritatingly sweet series of cover albums for the under 10 set. The producers enlist "The Kidz Bop Singers"- themselves members of the target demo- to cover, tunelessly, current pop hits. All of the songs are supposed to be kid friendly and kid approved. With very little (almost none in fact) editing, the singers gaily (double entendre on purpose) varble their tunes for the youth of America.
The problem, besides that fact that the singers are on the terrible side, is that the songs aren't necessarily age appropriate. Let's look at the track listing for the about-to-be-released Kidz Bob 7:
Pieces of Me (Ashlee Simpson); Let's Get It Started (The Black Eyed Peas); Breakaway (Kelly Clarkson); My Happy Ending (Avril Lavigne); Leave (Get Out) (Jojo); On The Way Down (Ryan Cabrerra); She Will Be Loved (Maroon 5); Lose My Breath (Destiny's Child); Accidentally In Love (Counting Crows); Heaven (Los Lonely Boys); Dare You To Move (Switchfoot); If I Ain't Got You (Alicia Keys); 1985 (Bowling For Soup); One Thing (Fingereleven); Float On (Modest Mouse); Beautiful Soul (Jesse McCartney); Welcome To My Life (Simple Plan); and My Boo (Usher f/Alicia Keys).
Anyone see some issues there? Besides the fact that no fewer than 8 of the 18 tracks are already as poppy as most humans can handle- Hell Jesse McCartney is like that male Mandy Moore- the other 10 have varying levels of inappropriateness from wholly manic depressive (bordering on suicidal) [Simple Plan, Switchfoot and Fingereleven] to really skeevy sexual imagery [Maroon 5, Destiny's Child, and Usher] to just not meant for pre-tweens [Black Eyed Peas and Alicia Keys].
For example, "1985" by Bowling for soup (Sample lyric: "Debbie just hit the wall/She never had it all/One Prozac a day/Husbands a CPA/Her dreams went out the door/When she turned twenty four/Only been with one man/What happen to her plan?"), how is this a song that young kids should be hearing? One Prozac a day? Awesome. And the assertion that her life basically ended at the age of 24 is just the message that the youth should be hearing. To our ears, this song is funny, quasi-nostalgic and poppy fluff. But to young ears it could be the thing that sets them on a disaffected path.
Simple Plan's "Welcome to my Life" is another prime example of a song that shouldn't be on this collection. The song is basically the inner monologue of a kid on the verge. Someone who feels isolated, sad, and miserable. Witness the chorus: "What it's like/to be hurt/to be lost/to be left out in the dark/to be kicked when you're down/and feel like you've been pushed around/to be on he edge of breaking down/and no one's there to save you/no you don' know what it's like/welcome to my life" So uplifting and life affirming, no?
Look, I'm not saying that kids should be sheltered from the harshness of life. In fact I'm firmly against censorship of any kind. But, I also recognize the concept of age appropriateness. The Kidz Bop franchise is predicated upon the idea of sugary sweet pop songs being re-popified, made more sugary and repackaged for a lower demo. When they take songs such as these, edited or not, they risk harming those that they purport to celebrate.
Besides, and this is the true point, Kidz Bop is gross, lame, irritating, false, and needs to be stopped. All other things aside, these albums are destroying the youth of America. And what do they have planned for Kidz Bop 8? Anthrax and Pantera covers in Kidz Bob Classic? How about the Kidz Bop rendition of Poison's "Unskinny Bop"? No really, it's ok.
Eric at 1/15/2005 04:47:42 AM
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In an effort to destress before my 3 super-important Spanish tests tomorrow, I decided to watch the commentary track on the "Showgirls V.I.P. Edition" DVD. The commentator, David Schmader, really gets- in a far more eloquent fashion I must add- what I love about this movie.
To paraphrase, everyone involved in this movie is making the absolute worst, most incorrect decision at every moment. How Paul Verhooven got many grown adults to agree to this is incredible. Except Gina Gershon, she knows exactly which movie she's in and that's why she gets away unscathed.
This man is hilarious and calling it the "greatest post-modern comedy of all time". I love that MGM had the guts to put a commentary track on a super special edition of a movie that is mostly reviled just makes obvious what I've always felt was true, this film is fantastically horrendous.
I realize that for many of you, watching this film is like watching a particularly grisly car accident, but I recommend this commentary to anyone who loves to enjoy a beautifully heinous cinematic experience annotated by a man who loves it for all the right reasons. And David Schmader.
"Why isn't anyone helping her? She needs help!"-- David Schmader on Nomi's first "private dance scene"
Eric at 1/11/2005 01:04:47 AM
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El Torito
1961 Diamond Blvd.
Concord CA, 94520
I never review eateries. Having never really been moved in a positive or negative way by anything that's ever happened to me at one, the thought never crossed my mind. That is, however, until Sunday December 26, 2004 when I dined at chain restaurant "El Torito"'s Concord location. Let me tell you, I was moved.
When my party of two walked in at 5:00 PM. we saw about 10 people milling about the entry area. No employees showed up for about 3 minutes, when a shift supervisor arrived to tell a larger party that they were ready to seat them. 5 people gone, the hostess arrives to take another couple to a table. Then, 3 more couples walk in. The restaurant, which was mostly empty it appeared, must have been enormous because it took the hostess a full 5 minutes to seat and return. During this time, an employee was sitting right behind the host stand folding napkins, never acknowledging a single customer. Finally, the hostess arrived and began taking a couple to a table, the problem was, that couple had suddenly jumped forward about six places in line. I corrected to hostess and informed her of the proper order of arrivals, an act that the latecomers seemed to find galling. I say, it was fair.
After being seated (now about 5:15) the supervisor walks by and practically tosses the chips and salsa at us. As we calmly read the menus- as calmly as the employee still folding napkins and as the bored looking bar staff, one of which was also folding napkins- the waitress, a woman whose name tag read C.C.W., finally arrived to take our drink and dinner orders at about 5:20.
When the chips and salsa were finished, we waited. And waited. We noticed that the other server in our section had tables comprised of the people who had arrived many minutes after we had and they already had their drinks. Our table, along with the three others served by our server were drink less. At about 5:30 the table behind us grabbed a supervisor, a man named Justin, and informed him of the drink situation, which was promptly rectified, 5 minutes later. The dining area, although appearing moderately busy, seemed to consist mostly of uniformed "El Torito" employees milling about aimlessly or... folding napkins. Still our salsa stood empty.
At 5:35 our appetizer arrived, 15 minutes after we ordered it, we noticed that the people who had arrived after us, by at least 10 minutes no less, had received their full orders and their server was beginning to check up on them. This other serer had at least 7 tables who wanted for nothing while ours had just 4 which were being seriously neglected. Still two employees were folding napkins while the bored bar staff milled around and managers seated (where had the hostess gone? Who knows?). At 5:45 our chips and salsa were refilled, as were our drinks. Our food was nowhere to be seen.
The man behind us had had enough and spoke to the supervisor. Our food was brought out immediately... 10 minutes later. Our order was: cold, wrong, and mostly inedible. We ate what we could, hearing from near by patrons that their orders were as expected. Meanwhile, the patrons of the other serer were receiving their bills or ordering deserts. Our server tried valiantly to serve us a desert, but the question was asked in such a rushed forceful way, it wouldn't have been appealing even if we thought that we might receive the proffered sweets prior to 2005. No, we simply requested the bill.
Now, having had patrons speak to the supervisor about this situation previously, and knowing he was seeing this deplorable service and attitude first hand, I was expecting- from a customer service stand point- a price break. Ah, but that was not to be. In fact, our full $33 bill was handed to us.
Incensed, I found the manager, a man named Octavio, and explained the situation. I chose my words carefully but I was upset. Not at the shoddy service or the snotty treatment, but really with the obvious mismanagement that was apparent, and I've never worked in a restaurant. Octavio heard my complaints and then said "I'll take care of this because I want you out of here". No apologies, no mea culpas, not even a single lame-duck excuse. No, "I want you out of here".
Well, out of there I went after bidding farewell to the other diners who'd suffered with us at about 6:10. The tables of the other server had new patrons ready to go by this point and two of them already had drinks. I noticed our table fully bussed before we were out of the room. At least some of the service was efficient. And still, two employees sat folding napkins.
Eric at 12/28/2004 01:19:30 AM
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